Uptalk

Keep it down! The end of your sentence, that is.

"Upward intonation" or "uptalk" is when the pitch of your voice rises at the end of a sentence. Using a rising intonation at the end of a sentence is entirely appropriate when asking questions, but many people---often women under 35--use upward intonation at the ends of sentences that are not questions. This makes it seem like an assertive statement is a question. Upward intonation has been mocked as "Valley Girl" speech, although it's a much wider bad habit. Teenage girls who spoke this way in the 1980s and 1990s have grown up, yet the habit persists. I should know! I, like, used to speak that way? And ended sentences with rising pitches? As though I were asking for approval? And I kept doing it, even after I was out of high school and it wasn't cute anymore?

But then I learned to put periods at the ends of sentences, and to use upward intonation only when I meant to express questioning. I managed to become conscious of uptalk and learn to stop by imagining the sentences visually, as though they were typed out in my mind's eye, and then imagining myself pronouncing them as they were "written" in my mind.

But my opposition to uptalk isn't that interesting. Take a look at the following exchange from the play by Donald Margulies, Collected Stories.

RUTH. Do you mind if I ask you something?
LISA. Uh. Okay. Sure.
RUTH. Why do you talk like that?
LISA. Excuse me?
RUTH. You have a tendency to add question marks to the ends of simple declarative sentences. Do you know that?
LISA. Oh, God...
RUTH. When a simple declarative sentence will do, you inflect it in such a way...When I asked you where you got your bachelor's, you didn't simply say, "Princeton," a statement of fact, you said "Princeton?" You hear how my voice went up?
LISA. I can't believe I'm still doing that. I used to talk like that, when I was younger...
RUTH. (Talking over her) I'm not saying you do it all the time but you do it often enough for me to notice. And it's very striking because you're obviously an intelligent, gifted young woman but it's really kind of dopey, if you ask me.
LISA. It is, it really is, it's awful.
RUTH. You're not alone. Most of my students speak this way. I'm not absolutely certain but I think more young women speak this way than young men. And there's something almost poignant about it, all these capable young women somehow begging to be heard, begging to be understood. "Can you hear me?" "Are you with me?" "Am I being heard?" [...] Listen to yourselves! Nobody's going to take you seriously in the real world! Who's going to take you seriously if you talk like that? No one! Why should they? If I were you, I'd do everything I could to erase it from my memory; expunge it from my speech center. The moment you hear yourself doing it, stop and correct yourself.

I couldn't say it better myself. You're not asking me, you're telling me. Keep it down.